From super-achiever, people pleaser, or good girl to your future self with Dr. Shefali

Dr. Shefali was 44 years old when she had an epiphany: the only person stopping her from harnessing her inner power was herself.  She says, “I truly believe that there comes a critical moment in a woman’s life – typically around mid-life – where she faces a pivotal choice. I certainly came to that moment in my own life: either I continued being inauthentic to myself and stayed encaged in fear OR I stepped into a new dimension where I was fully, consciously, my true self.”

I am in that moment in my life right now so it was such a gift to talk to Dr. Shefali about that critical moment, what it feels like, what it is, what it means, and what awaits us on the other side.

Dr. Shefali received her doctorate in clinical psychology from Columbia University. Specializing in the integration of Western psychology and Eastern philosophy, she brings together the best of both worlds for her clients. She is an expert in family dynamics and personal development, teaching courses around the globe. Dr. Shefali has written four books, including the award-winning, New York Times bestsellers The Conscious Parent and The Awakened Family. She’s been featured prominently on Oprah Winfrey’s platforms, Good Morning America, the Today Show, Hoda & Jenna, among many others. Dr. Shefali lives in New York City. More at: www.aradicalawakening.com

You can find Dr. Shefali’s book, A Radical Awakening, anywhere you get your books.

The second step to the life of your dreams (it’s not what you think)

Last week I shared the first step to take to create the life of your dreams and in this episode I’m following up with the second step. It’s another simple but powerful one and I can’t wait for you to hear it.

If you’re like many of the high achievers I work with, it’s likely that you have too much on your plate. I created The Life Review to help you get clear on exactly what is feeling like too much so you can take steps to have a life that feels both full and spacious. Download The Life Review here.

Love the episode? Like the show? Subscribe and leave a review.

Interested in 1-1 coaching? Book a call to tell me more about where you’re at right now, your vision of your future self, and to see if it makes sense for us to work together.

The simple first step to the life you want

There is a very simple but critical step you need to take to create the life of your dreams and it’s likely not what you think. In this episode, I’ll reveal what it is and invite you to try it.

If you’re like many of the high achievers I work with, it’s likely that you have too much on your plate. I created The Life Review to help you get clear on exactly what is feeling like too much so you can take steps to have a life that feels both full and spacious. Download The Life Review here.

Love the episode? Like the show? Subscribe and leave a review.

Interested in 1-1 coaching? Book a call to tell me more about where you’re at right now, your vision of your future self, and to see if it makes sense for us to work together.

I’m back, thank God for breaks, and a new favorite country song

There’s a country song I can’t get enough of these days. It’s got lyrics that both take me to places I haven’t been in a while and speaks to something deep inside of me that I’ve felt for a really long time. It makes me smile, it makes me sing from my soul, it makes me weep. I can’t wait to tell you about it.

I also reflect on my podcast sabbatical and where I hope to go next from here.

These Days by Mackenzie Porter on Spotify

September Sabbatical

I’m taking a sabbatical from the podcast in September. In this episode you’ll hear…

  • Why I’m taking a sabbatical
  • What I’m hoping to get out of it
  • What my inner critic thinks about it

Journal prompts

Where in your life would you like a sabbatical?

What would you be taking a sabbatical from?

If you want to get off the hamster wheel of life and want some coaching around what that can look like for you, email me at joanna@joanna-platt.com.

While I’m away, get your Love Always, Jo fix with these episodes from the archives…

Personal/Fun, Delightful Episodes:

What My Husband and I Do During Our Quarterly Retreats

What I Learned in a Trapeze Class

Future Me

The 70’s Man

On growing up

Great interviews:

What It Really Means to Do Less with Kate Northrup

Taking a Month Off Work and Social Media with Brit Kolo (a great conversation about sabbaticals)

On Boundaries with Dr. Lauren Appio I’ve had listeners tell me that this is one they return to again and again

Joy and Being Brave with Kristen Kalp

Tapping Into Your Full Capacity for Pleasure with Lacey Broussard

Using Clothes to Increase Your Impact with Carrie Montgomery

 

Creating Space for Yourself in a High Conflict Relationship with Julie Beckerman

Episode title and photo of guest Julie Beckerman

Summary

Through more than a decade of loss, battling addiction, an eating disorder, and a high-conflict divorce that cost her close to a quarter of a million dollars in legal fees, Julie Beckerman learned how to create space for herself no matter what is going on around her and to create freedom no matter the circumstance.

In this episode, you’ll learn…

  • The four elements of a high-conflict personality
  • A definition of codependency that gave me a big ah-ha moment
  • How to navigate a relationship with a high-conflict personality
  • Specific tactics to hold your own in a conversation with a high-conflict personality

Meet Julie

Julie Beckerman is a Certified Professional Coach from the institute of Professional Excellence in Coaching and a certified career and development counselor from NYU. She studied IO psychology at Teachers College at Columbia University, has experience and training in Dialectic Behavior Therapy, Effective Communication, and Mindfulness techniques with a background working in business and Human Resources, and extensive experience dealing with loss and addiction.

Website | Instagram | Facebook 

Links:

Quotes:

  • Codependency is when you’re doing more for the health of a person in a relationship than they’re doing. I’m taking more responsibility for their emotional state than they are. -Julie
  • You can’t more about another person’s problem than they care about their problem. -Joanna
  • Mindfulness is the ability to direct your mind to where you want it to go. -Julie
  • A muscle you have to build is your own self-identity – Joanna
  • You don’t go from negative to positive. It’s negative to neutral, neutral to positive. -Julie
  • You need to know a judgement when you see a judgement. Because a judgement is an opinion. And opinions are not facts. -Julie
  • Be careful when you’re chasing monsters that you don’t become one. -Julie
  • Spend your energy showing the world who you are, not broadcasting who your ex is. You’re not their PR person. -Julie

Journal Prompts

  • What are the things that take your stress levels down to a 1 or 2 on a scale of 1-10?
  • Who are you? Who do you want to be?

Call Your People

Podcast badge + title: Call Your People

This is a super short and sweet episode with a simple message – call your people – and the story behind why this message is on my mind. 

If you want connect with me on getting through burnout, I would love to chat with you about a coaching spot in the fall. Email me to schedule a call to see if we’re a good fit: joanna@joanna-platt.com

Quotes:

It’s good to connect with your people.

It’s good to ask for help. It’s OK to ask for help.

Your inner critic will say “they’re probably busy” or “I don’t want to bother them.” Don’t listen.

Pink square with quote: Your inner critic will say things like "they're probably busy" or "I don't want to bother them." Don't listen.

Write a Story, Change Your Life with Lara Zielin

Podcast logo and show title plus photo of guest wearing blue framed glasses and white top smiling

Lara Zielin is an author who realized that she could use the process she uses to create stories for her characters to create the life of her dreams. In this episode, she shares that process with us.

Listen in to hear…

  • The simple writing exercise Lara used to change her life method and how you can do it too,
  • Three science based reasons why this writing practice works,
  • How this practice can save you from self-sabotage,
  • A breakdown of the Hero’s Journey framework and,
  • How the Hero’s Journey applies to your pursuit of your dreams

Meet Lara

Lara Zielin is a published author, editor, and the founder of Author Your Life. Her debut young-adult novel Donut Days was selected to the Lone Star Reading List, and her romance novel And Then He Kissed Me (written as Kim Amos) was nominated for a Romantic Times Reader’s Choice Award. Her magazine articles have appeared in Writers Digest, Culture, Medicine at Michigan, and more. Her nonfiction book Author Your Life is about using the power of writing to create a better story for yourself. She lives in Michigan with her husband and dog, and her goal is pretty much to eat all the cheese.

Website | Instagram | Facebook | Book

Books mentioned:

Quotes:

  • “You don’t have to plot out your life like a book.” – Lara
  • “One scene at a time” -Lara
  • “May my eyes be open to see, my ears be open to hear, my heart be open to feel what the universe is trying to tell me.” -Lara
  • “I think of every day like a new chapter.” -Lara
  • “All good stories take time.” -Lara

What Do You Get Credit For?

Podcast logo and episode title What Do You Get Credit For?

My friend Stacy and I pretty much have the same job. But, we have different bosses and those bosses give us credit for different things. A conversation we had around this inspired today’s episode.

Listen in to hear…

  • What Stacy and I give ourselves credit for (and why this made me turn my head in a side-eye)
  • How we can change the rubric
  • My #1 goal for the next 60 days

Announcements:

This is the first episode of July and that means that there are a new round of Coffee + Coaching sessions available for later this month. Coffee + Coaching sessions are one-time sessions to chart your vision for a particular area of your life. joanna-platt.com/coffee

Love Always, Jo is on Spotify now!

Links:

Quotes:

  • Feeling like a failure is a huge energy drain.
  • Giving yourself credit for what you’re already doing, and recognizing that you are not a failure, can seriously change the world. 
  • The way you are already living your life is enough.
  • I will prioritize my own needs and speak and act accordingly.

Journal Prompts

  • What do you give yourself credit for?
  • What would you like to get credit for?
  • If you created the rubric, what would it look like?

083: The Inner Critic + Money

The Inner Critic + Money

We’re starting a new type of show on Love Always, Jo today: “the Inner Critic +” and today’s topic is the Inner Critic + Money. In this series, we’ll explore how the inner critic shows up in different areas of our lives. If you like this episode, DM me on IG and let me know what subjects you’d like me to cover next.

In today’s episode, you’ll hear…

  • What the inner critic is
  • What your inner critic might say about how to use money, debt, and keeping up with the Jones’
  • Why I love the inner critic so much
  • What’s happening when you’re looking at your budget and getting overwhelmed
  • Questions to help you reflect on your beliefs around money

 

Links mentioned:

 

Quotes:

  • I believe in buying the things you want, buying the things that bring you joy
  • You want to choose the rules that ultimately serve you
  • What if debt was neutral? What if debt wasn’t good or bad?
  • We have to remember that we are adults and we are wise and we get to choose what we navigate
  • What rules are you playing by when it comes to money? How do they fit?
  • What does future you believe about money?

 

Journal Prompts

  • What does your inner critic say about money?
  • What role do you want money to play in your life and decisions?
  • What does future you believe about money?