Tag: holidays

065: Heart to Heart on Receiving

Posted on by jplatt27

Heart to heart on receiving - Love Always Jo Podcast Episode 065 #holidayadvice #holidaysurvivalguide #survivingtheholidays #holidayprep #preparingforchristmas #preparingfortheholidays #innercritic #familyexpectations #christmas2018 #relationshippodcast #holidaytips #christmasprep #thanksgivingprep #howtoreceivegifts

 

In this month’s Heart-to-Heart we’re talking about receiving, how vulnerable it is, how to receive gifts well, the energy of receiving, and how to practice receiving this holiday season.

 

Journal Prompts:

  • Write about times you got a gift and didn’t receive it as well as you could have. What was happening internally for you?
  • When you hug someone do you focus more on the hug you’re giving or the hug you’re receiving?

Quotes:

  • Deserving is not a prerequisite for receiving.
  • Gift receiving mantra: I’m allowed to receive this.
  • Receive first. Evaluate second. 
  • You don’t have to believe you deserve something to receive it well. 
  • You don’t have to deserve something to receive it well. 
  • Receive the love first, even if the gift isn’t for you

 

Announcements:

  • Looking for a resolution-free way to plan for 2019? I’m hosting a Vision Board Workshop in DC on January 17. Tickets here.
  • If you’d like to send questions, thoughts, concerns or advice about upcoming topics you can do so at joanna-platt.com/hearttoheart. Submissions are due by the first of the month. Here are the upcoming topics:

 

Heart to heart on receiving - Love Always Jo Podcast Episode 065 #holidayadvice #holidaysurvivalguide #survivingtheholidays #holidayprep #preparingforchristmas #preparingfortheholidays #innercritic #familyexpectations #christmas2018 #relationshippodcast #holidaytips #christmasprep #thanksgivingprep #howtoreceivegifts

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What I learned over LDW

Posted on by Kelsey Leetzow

I had a realization over Labor Day weekend.

I am much better, feel much better, when my life is in motion.

I unintentionally pulled the joy and delight out of my life in the name of growing my business. I started to feel like I couldn’t prioritize friendships or my health because I needed to focus all of my energy and my free time on my business. I’m realizing, though well-meaning, it’s not serving me well.

We had this thing at my high school called Gym Night. My sister always said that she had the best grades during Gym Night season. She attributed this to having less time to focus on homework and things so she didn’t mess around and simply buckled down to get her homework done in the limited time she had.

I’ve gone the exact opposite of that. I’ve stripped my weekly calendar of all the fun things: cooking, seeing friends, working out. My life has become a big go to work, come home, sit on the couch and watch TV loop. And you can bet that I was NOT working on my business in all this free time.

I banged out more content for an upcoming e-course in one plane ride to California than I have in the entire month since I had the idea.

I always feel like I’m super focused on trips to PA too. Probably because we’ve got a lot of people to see and there’s only limited time to spend by myself.

I’ve gained weight. I had a breakdown in the doctor’s office recently about how beige my life is and how many things I’ve got going on in the fall.

Then Labor Day weekend happened. I went to happy hour on Thursday night and then Friday afternoon when work got out early and then had a girlfriend over Friday night. Saturday I got a massage and then later in the day Mike and I tried a new-to-us BBQ place in Georgetown and I stopped at the Gap on my way home. Sunday I had brunch with girlfriends and then Mike and I made dinner at home. Monday morning I made breakfast at home, kneading dough for these breakfast buns by hand for eight minutes. I also made rice krispie treats. Then we drove 45 mins to a furniture place in Virginia and then spent the afternoon and evening with friends at their house. That’s about what I typically do in a whole month, let alone a weekend!

I wrote a blog post over the weekend and I’m writing this at 7am the day after Labor Day.

I haven’t been on a roll like this in a very very long time. I feel like I’ve uncovered a secret I should’ve known about myself:

I am at my best when I’ve got a lot going on.

Note: this is very different and I’m very cognizant about numbing with busyness. That is a completely different thing and needs to be monitored. Busyness is an addiction like any other and I’ve definitely used it in the past.

So, I’m going to add the color back into my life. Cooking (which I love), happy hour, exercise. Because not only do I want a full life, it seems like I need one too.

a new kind of christmas list

Posted on by jplatt27

christmas mug

Every year, Mike’s mom asks us for Christmas lists. They’re due before we head back to DC after Thanksgiving weekend. I always struggle with this activity–feeling like it’s forced and I’m listing things that I’m lukewarm about.

I decided to make my Christmas list a little differently this year. I was going to make an intentional Christmas list. And I did. I took great care in making my Christmas list this year. And the whole process of making the list was very enjoyable.

I started by asking how I want to feel in 2014. I came up with three feelings:

cozy, pretty, and abundant

Then I thought of things that would support these feelings.

On my list:

Cozy
tea
throw blanket
Bread & Wine: A Love Letter to Life Around the Table with Recipes by Shauna Niequist (this could also go under abundant)

Pretty
1″ curling iron
sleeveless blouses to go under cardigans
Sephora Favorite Sampler (hoping Santa can find this…I saw it in store but can’t find it online)

Abundant
Kate Spade business card holder
Godiva chocolate bars (the small ones they have at Barnes and Noble)
Vase (fresh flowers always make me feel abunant…and pretty too)
Josie Maran Body Butter

I’m really happy with my list. But also, I think this process was really good for me. I’ve been working a lot on valuing and taking care of myself (more to come on that later) and I think this was a great exercise in learning how it feels to take good care and value yourself.

How do you want to feel in 2014? 

What’s on your Christmas list this year?

How would your list change if you first thought about how you want to feel in 2014 and only put things that supported that vision?

 

 

how to keep the holidays joyful

Posted on by jplatt27

Mike’s aunt gave his mom some great advice for the holidays. She said “decide what you want to do and just do that.”

Simple. Decide what you want to do and just do that.

This time of year is crazy. There are lots of places to go and people to see. And a lot of tasks that need to be completed to go to those places and see those people.

For a time of year that is supposed to be about family, love, joy, hope, and peace, there are so many demands on your time and energy.

It’s easy to get burnt out and not enjoy the most wonderful time of the year. In fact, many times this time of year can be one of the most stressful.

I think that’s partly because we feel so many obligations. Feel like we have to do this or that to make someone else happy. And often we give in to those obligations and in doing so, we still a little bit of joy from ourselves.

But it really doesn’t have to be this way. We can start with the simple advice from Mike’s aunt. Decide what you want to do and just do that.

You can do it. Trust me.

I actually had a great experience with this last year. Last year, I mentioned that we were having a new type of Thanksgiving. But, I never shared how that went.

Long story short Thanksgiving usually goes like this: lunch at 1pm, dinner at 4pm, double food coma and complete exhaustion by 6pm. Last year, I said we’re going to do it different. I’d really like to take a nap after the first meal instead of rush around. So I told my dad that we’d come a little bit later. After the first meal at Mike’s parents, I took a nap. I woke up without an alarm and as soon as I woke up I wanted to go see my family. We got there around 6 or so and ended up staying and chatting for hours. I think we didn’t leave until close to 11!

In doing that, we got relaxed, quality time with both of our families. I was completely present and happy at both events and my family was able to have all of me, the happy, joyful Joanna. They got me. The Joanna I want to be.

So, I know from experience, you can decide what you want to do and just do that. And your holidays may actually be happier for it.

Tell me: what do you really want to do this holiday season? what do you want permission not to do?

P.S. Here’s a beautiful post about this same subject:

hello 2013

Posted on by jplatt27

The past two days have been just what we needed. After 9 jam packed days in PA, we needed these two days to decompress and do our own thing.

Both days consisted of breakfast out, shopping, relaxing, napping, straightening our apartment, and more relaxing.  We had nothing to do and no schedule, just kind of did what we felt like when we felt like it.

Though not nearly as intense as last year we continued some beginning of the year rituals–we did a little organizing and purging and had a mini-budget conversation.

We capped off our break and began the new year with one of our favorite meals. (This is tonight’s dinner–last night we ordered Chinese.)

I’m looking forward 2013 and all the new year brings. Cheers!

Talk to me:

How did you start your year?

back from a long holiday

Posted on by jplatt27

It’s been over a month since I wrote!  December was a doozy for some reason–just lots going on and since I haven’t been doing a great job of managing my SAD, my energy for anything that wasn’t completely necessary was pretty much nil.

But, I’m back from 9 days in PA and this break has brought my writing brain back.

I guess I’ll start where I left off: Thanksgiving.

Thanksgiving was great this year.  We changed things up slightly and it worked out perfectly.  We relaxed through lunch with Mike’s family, not looking at our watches with one foot out the door the entire time. Then, I took a nap for an hour or so.  As soon as I woke up I was ready to go to my Dad’s to see my family! We got there around 6:30 and ended up staying ’til 11:00! Because I wasn’t tired and itching to go to bed the whole time, I was fully present and really relaxed into the evening.

I’m into this casual, come and go when you feel like it thing.  It’s much more my speed.  Though we still went through all of the same activities we have for years, the mind-set was different. And that changed everything.

I’m glad to be back.  Looking forward to catching up with you all much more frequently in 2013.

Love, love, love!

Thanksgiving: out with the old, in with the new

Posted on by jplatt27

We’re doing something new this Thanksgiving! Can you tell I’m excited??

Since our parents live 10 mins apart, Mike and I have done a double thanksgiving for the last few years, eating at his parents’ at 1 and my dad’s at 4 or 5. Yeah, it’s a lot.

I had complained in years past how it’s a lot of food and my stomach hurts just thinking about it. Which remains true. But last year I realized how lucky we are that we don’t have to choose. That we are able to see both families at the holidays.

None of the above has changed. My stomach still hurts thinking about a double Thanksgiving and we are still lucky that we don’t have to choose and can see both families at the holidays.

But Thanksgiving shouldn’t be about portion control or keeping your eye on the clock. Thanksgiving is about sharing a delicious meal and quality time with people you love.  And we don’t have to see both families or eat two meals on Thanksgiving to honor this holiday.

Here’s what I want to do on Thanksgiving: eat and drink to my heart’s delight, move to the couch for the infamous turkey nap, and wake up to have more pie.

So the double Thanksgiving ends this year.

I decided we will eat at Mike’s parents’ house and take our time. Maybe we’ll make our way over to my dad’s or my mom’s later in the evening–maybe we won’t.  Regardless, we’ll make sure we spend time with everyone we love over this nice long weekend.

Our "first" Valentine's Day

Posted on by jplatt27

Our first Valentine’s Day as a married couple was probably our best yet.  Ok, definitely our best yet.  Considering I asked Mike to brainstorm some past Valentine’s Days for a post on 2/14 and neither of us could remember what we did last year.

This Valentine’s Day, Mike had a sweet idea: to try to replicate the dessert pizza from one of our favorite DC restaurants and have dinner at home.  I’d been wanting to recreate Matchbox‘s dessert pizza since we started making our own pizza months ago so I loved this thoughtful idea.

Mike let me choose what we had for dinner so we made this amazing lasagna. We made this lasagna over a year ago and hadn’t been able to find the recipe since. But with a little searching, Mike was able to find it. (Click here for the recipe.)

I had the sauce for the lasagna working when Mike got home from work. And he quickly got to work on the dough for the pizza. We had the Pandora love songs station going and were totally in our element.

After the lasagna was in, the dough was rising, and we had some dishes done, we sat down at the island for a little appetizer.  (I can get grumpy when I’m hungry so I this was a precautionary measure that turned out sweet.) We had the rest of that delicious bread leftover from dinner on Sunday, dipped in a little olive oil, salt, and pepper, and some wine.

I was so happy. We were chatting, reminiscing about past Valentine’s Days, and kissing and I got really emotional and started to cry happy tears.

The lasagna turned out delicious and we ate on the couch while watching an episode of our new show Modern Family. I later thought that it was odd that we ate in front of the TV instead of at the table on Valentine’s Day but we were in the kitchen for so long prepping the meal and washing the dishes that we probably both just wanted to relax on the couch.

Then it was time for the dessert pizza.  We did a little “recon” on Friday night by going to Matchbox and ordering dessert pizza.  OK, we planned to go out to dinner that night to catch up and we hadn’t been to Matchbox in quite a while and chalked it up as “research.” But I’m so glad we did.  Our server was able to shed some light into the icing which we would’ve never gotten close otherwise. We were also able to focus in on some of the flavors to make sure we didn’t forget anything.

Well, the pizza was a success! All the flavors were there: cinnamon, sugar, blackberry, raspberry, strawberry, mint, and balsamic reduction.  The dough was very chewy and we’ll probably make some changes to that next time but overall the dessert hit the spot. We were so proud of ourselves. We ate our pizza on the couch while watching another episode of Modern Family.

Honestly, this was a perfect evening. We talked, we laughed, we cooked, we ate delicious food.  We were really connected and really enjoyed each other’s company.  It was different than a normal night because we were technically on a date and neither one of us was expecting to do anything else other than be with each other.

Neither of us wanted the night to end. When I woke up on Wednesday morning, I was bummed that it was all over.  I wanted to stretch the date and stay in our happy, relaxed, connected state. You know, like a long weekend that you just don’t want to end.

Definitely the best Valentine’s Day yet.

Christmas before Mike

Posted on by jplatt27

Before I started dating Mike, Christmas wasn’t a happy time for me. No holidays were.

In my family, holidays were occasions that magnified the underlying unhappiness of our family. Holidays were a reminder that our family was irreparably broken. That we were not as happy or perfect as we pretended to be.

They were days that we were forced to spend together because everyone else was spending the day with their family.  And we couldn’t go outside because it was too cold.  So we were trapped inside with a mother and father that didn’t get along. And that tension permeated everything. Even if there wasn’t an outburst or blatant fighting, I could feel the tension.  I knew something was wrong.

I got sick almost every Christmas. And almost everything Thanksgiving.  I’m sure it was all the stress built up in my body.  I remember being sick for a lot of holidays–fever, vomiting. Ironic for the girl that didn’t miss a day of school from 4th grade through high school graduation.  I don’t think it’s a coincidence that I got sick when I had to stay home for extended periods of time.

It wasn’t a happy occasion.  We didn’t really have traditions. Activities that are typically fun holiday traditions like decorating the tree were just chores for me because they were painful.

Of course there were good moments: when I got Barbie roller-skates, extended family Christmas parties where the boys got Hess trucks and the girls got China dolls. On Christmas Eve, my siblings and I all slept in the same room and read Christmas stories. We busted through stockings and presents within a half hour and spent the rest of the day playing with new toys and watching a new movie.

But overall I’d say I felt trapped.

I’m not sure how my siblings would describe Christmas at our house.  I wonder if their memories are as painful as mine.  If they have vivid memories. I really don’t remember the holidays.  I really don’t remember a lot from my childhood.

Christmas at Mike’s house was a very different experience. Starting with Thanksgiving, his dad’s favorite holiday, the Christmas season is Mike’s favorite time of the year. They’d all decorate the tree, listen to Christmas music, watch Christmas movies. It was definitely the most wonderful time of the year, a time of family, and joy.

So when Mike and I started dating, he shared his child-like awe and wonder and excitement about Christmas with me.  And over the years, Christmas has slowly become a happy time. A time to enjoy the company of family and friends, to slow down and take it all in. I know that in the years to come it’s only going to get better.

The Little Things: Christmas 2011 edition

Posted on by jplatt27

Back in DC after a very busy but great holiday weekend with our families in PA.  Here’s a list of the little things that made this weekend great:

  • pulling up and seeing Christmas lights on my Dad’s house after years without them
  • the smell of a real tree
  • seeing It’s a Wonderful Life at the old Newtown Theater on Christmas Eve
  • waking up with my husband on Christmas morning
  • giving a great gift and the smiles that follow when it’s opened
  • sitting in front of the fire
  • Mike and I putting the finishing touches on Christmas dinner with perfect timing for serving
  • coffee in a Christmas mug
  • laughing with Mike’s parents
  • the huge smiles on my siblings’ and Dad’s faces while iceskating on Christmas day

  • seeing a picture of my mom and me from my wedding day hanging above her desk at work
  • holding hands while iceskating
  • seeing Mike back on skates after 3 years
  • good conversations with Mike’s cousins
  • the decision to bring cheesesteaks and hoagies to Dad’s to eat a chill dinner with everyone at home
  • seeing old friends at the annual Christmas and little hot-dog party, especially one I haven’t seen in a while