Summary
Through more than a decade of loss, battling addiction, an eating disorder, and a high-conflict divorce that cost her close to a quarter of a million dollars in legal fees, Julie Beckerman learned how to create space for herself no matter what is going on around her and to create freedom no matter the circumstance.
In this episode, you’ll learn…
- The four elements of a high-conflict personality
- A definition of codependency that gave me a big ah-ha moment
- How to navigate a relationship with a high-conflict personality
- Specific tactics to hold your own in a conversation with a high-conflict personality
Meet Julie
Julie Beckerman is a Certified Professional Coach from the institute of Professional Excellence in Coaching and a certified career and development counselor from NYU. She studied IO psychology at Teachers College at Columbia University, has experience and training in Dialectic Behavior Therapy, Effective Communication, and Mindfulness techniques with a background working in business and Human Resources, and extensive experience dealing with loss and addiction.
Website | Instagram | Facebook
Links:
- Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder by Bill Eddy
- Positive Parenting by Rebecca Eanes
- High Conflict Institute
Quotes:
- Codependency is when you’re doing more for the health of a person in a relationship than they’re doing. I’m taking more responsibility for their emotional state than they are. -Julie
- You can’t more about another person’s problem than they care about their problem. -Joanna
- Mindfulness is the ability to direct your mind to where you want it to go. -Julie
- A muscle you have to build is your own self-identity – Joanna
- You don’t go from negative to positive. It’s negative to neutral, neutral to positive. -Julie
- You need to know a judgement when you see a judgement. Because a judgement is an opinion. And opinions are not facts. -Julie
- Be careful when you’re chasing monsters that you don’t become one. -Julie
- Spend your energy showing the world who you are, not broadcasting who your ex is. You’re not their PR person. -Julie
Journal Prompts
- What are the things that take your stress levels down to a 1 or 2 on a scale of 1-10?
- Who are you? Who do you want to be?
Podcast: Play in new window | Download