Tag: feelings

Why I’m loving winter this year

Posted on by jplatt27

I’m loving winter this year. Absolutely loving it.

I’ve been resting a whole bunch and making soups. Burning two holiday scented candles at one time because it feels good and I often can’t decide which scent I want.

I’ve been loving winter because it totally jives with who I am. Winter calls for us to slow way down and to go in. To be reflective and quiet.

Last night it was pitch black when I got home from work at 5:40. Pitch black like it was 9pm. I put on an episode of the The Crown my new favorite Netflix show. I was ready for a nap 20 minutes in. I had just woken up when Mike walked in. We made and ate dinner together, settled in for an episode of The Affair, and I went to bed shortly after it was over. (Winter really jives with my natural inclination to go to bed at 9pm and sleep for 8 hours.)

Now, it’s before 6am and I’m sitting here, writing, in front of the Christmas tree and a pine scented candle burning.

There’s something about the dark that is just so cozy. It says rest. Be as you are. Don’t push too much. Don’t strive too hard.

I guess I’m liking winter because it feels like me.

I can get so caught up in the go-go-go. In the do more, be more. The long light days of summer encourage that. That really jives with part of me, but it also riles up my inner critic like nobody’s business. And that doesn’t feel good at all.

There’s something about winter that quiets my inner critic and allows my intuition to come in. I think I’ve just hit this sweet spot of how much I want to do/feel inclined to do and how appropriate that is. It’s just the most beautiful thing. I feel protected I guess. And more than anything else, one of our most basic needs is a feeling of safety. Winter has brought me that this season. And it’s just the most comforting thing.

I know it won’t last. That March and daylight savings will be here before we know it. So I’m going to savor these days, continuing to sink into rest and deep relaxation and going with the flow.

At least until December 23rd…

I hope you’ll find some time to savor between now and the end of the year. That you can find some solace from your inner critic in these short cozy days.

Sending love and peace your way,

Missing myself

Posted on by jplatt27

Yesterday, I wrote about how Mike and I have been missing each other. While writing that post, I realized that I kind of miss myself too.

Part of the reason we’ve been feeling disconnected is because I’ve been kind of depressed this week. Every day, all I wanted to do was go home and watch TV.  I didn’t feel like writing, I didn’t feel like reading, cooking, cleaning, brainstorming, anything. I just wanted to go sit on the couch, watch TV, and go to bed. I don’t feel overly sad, I just feel blah, not motivated to do anything. Yesterday morning it was so bad that I seriously considered calling out sick and just laying in bed all day.

This isn’t a new feeling for me, especially during the winter. But this also isn’t me.  I’m usually upbeat and excited and engaged, not just going through the motions. I don’t like operating like this.  But when I feel like I did this week, it’s hard to do anything else.

Instead of panicking over this feeling I told myself I’d give my body what it needs for the week and hopefully by the weekend I’d feel better.  I tried not to put pressure on the situation because being down over feeling down just makes the experience more painful.

I had a productive day at work yesterday and after a lunch time walk, I felt like myself again. Then Mike and I met for dinner and caught up a bit.

Now as the sun comes up over the District, I have the whole weekend ahead of me and I’m so glad I’m back to my normal self. I hope to write a lot, and be productive on some other things (maybe even run the numbers through my entire debt snowball). Other than that, Mike and I are going on a date tonight (planned during our text convo the other day) and I’m looking forward to having lunch with Jordan tomorrow. Here’s to a fun, energizing, and productive weekend.

Happy Saturday!

I’d love to know:

Do you ever feel not like yourself? How do you get through periods like this?

What are you up to this weekend?