Author: jplatt27

go at your own pace: what to do when you have two

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A while ago I wrote about going at your own pace in life and not comparing where you’re at with others.

It hit me this morning that we often struggle to find a good pace within ourselves, that this conflict is often an internal one.

As I mentioned in this post last week, I really want some down time right now. I’m really happy with that realization and am enjoying the space I’m giving myself.

But as I went out for a walk this morning, I thought “oh, I should email so-and-so” and “I need to look over that page on my website.” I’ve also had thoughts like “I want to read this book” and “I want to write that post” and “I want to reach out to this group.”

One part of me is like enjoy this time, space is good, relaxing will help you create. The other part of me is more cautious and saying “go, go, go” and “do, do, do,” fearful that if I don’t take action, if I don’t think about these things every single minute, that nothing will happen.

It’s hard to go at your own pace, what I’d call your soul pace, when there’s that voice in your head saying “hello, what are you doing?”

Here’s how I’m going to handle it: I’m going to keep going at the pace my soul wants to go while acknowledging the voice in my head by saying: “I know you’re looking out for me and want to make sure I get what I want. Thank you for that. But trust me, I know it’s coming. This pace is just fine.”

what i want right now

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What I want in my life right now, more than anything, is time for me. Time to lay in bed and look out the window. Time to cook delicious meals for myself and my husband.  Time to read and read and read some more.

I want to get my nails done. I want to go to the grocery store. I want to go to yoga and really feel my body. I want to be home. I want to do laundry. I want to make dinner with my husband and dance in the kitchen.  I want to be so in the moment that tears come to my eyes.

I want to remember. I want my mind to drift back to 7-up in CCD, to remember when Mike picked me up from the SATs and brought me a double cheeseburger from McDonalds.

I want time for deep reflection. For learning. For creating. For being.

So even as I work full-time and try to build a business on the side, I’m allowing myself to slow down. Because I suspect that giving myself this time and space will actually attract more of what I want into my life and may actually get me to peace, happiness, and freedom more quickly.

the blue dress

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On the way to LOFT at lunch yesterday I said to my friend “I’ve been feeling a little pudgy lately, finally realizing how much weight I put on this winter so I’m just going to look for a cardigan to go over the dress I already have. I was trying on dresses at H&M this weekend and I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. There’s nothing worse than standing in a dressing room in your underwear and feeling fat.”

But then LOFT had so many cute things and I picked up a few dresses and skirts to try on.  As I walked into the dressing room I thought, “oh, I said I wasn’t going to do this.”

Instead of turning around or feeling sorry for myself I made a decision:

I’m going to love my body the way it is right now.

Yep, that’s right.

I’m going to love my body the way it is right now.

Because what else can you do in that moment? You can berate yourself, or you can choose to love yourself.

I chose the latter.

Not only did I end up not getting the “is-that-what-I-really-look-like/i’m-so-fat/ugh” feeling, I ended up getting a blue dress in my normal size that fit perfectly (even after I told my friend I’d probably need the next size up).

How’s that for a reward for self-love?

three links and another for good luck

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Happy Monday!

Yesterday, we saw a purple-ish hue around the Tidal Basin, signs that the Cherry Blossoms are going to start blooming soon! Then this morning, we woke up to a winter wonderland. I wish I would’ve taken a picture during my commute this morning.  The trees were perfectly snow coated and looked so magical against a snow-covered Cathedral.

Today I want to share three posts that were shared with me this weekend that really spoke to me.  If you’re looking for something fun to do on your lunch break, take a look!

My best friend, Tina, and I are doing a 21-day meditation challenge and can totally relate to the realizations about spirituality and meditation shared in this article from hellogiggles.com.

It’s hard having friends all over the place, at “home,” in New York, and with work and other responsibilities, it’s hard to see friends that are even just scattered across DC as much as I’d like to.  I often wish my favorite people lived in my apartment building and I loved how that sentiment was shared in this post and the questions the author poses about it. Thanks for sharing, Jen!

And last, but certainly not least, I loved this post and recipe that Kristen shared in Friday Favorites this week. I agree that sometimes we just need to shake things up and I loved how she applied that message to this recipe.  Mike and I made this for dinner last night and it was yummy.  We used turkey sausage and I think it would’ve had deeper flavor with pork sausage so we’ll definitely use that next time!

And, because I truly believe that just because someone says you “should” do something doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for you, another one for good luck: Danielle LaPorte’s newest.

it's OK if you don't know

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A few weeks ago, I went back to my alma mater to participate in a career day for sophomores. I was part of a panel called Unexpected Career Paths.  It was so fun to share my career story and hear the stories and advice of other alumni on the panel.

A reoccurring theme through the event, from the keynote address to the panel discussions, was “it’s OK if you don’t know what you want to do.”

Let me repeat that:

It’s OK if you don’t know what you want to do for the rest of your life.

I did. And then I didn’t.

 

But, if you want to figure it out, I’d be happy to help.

my favorite lunch activities

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I need a break around lunch time every day.  I’ve realized that I don’t need to use my hour lunch break simply to eat lunch. I can really maximize the hour by using it to clear my head, get some sun, fresh air, some movement for my body. Though I love going out to lunch on occasion, some of my favorite lunch time activities have nothing to do with food.

Here are some ways I love to spend my lunch break:

get my hair cut: I’m pretty sure getting my hair cut at lunch is one of the best ideas I’ve ever had. I feel immediately relaxed when I walk into the hair salon. It’s like a little spa break in the middle of the day. And then you go back to work with nice hair. Do it on a day you have a date night…bada bing.

go to the library: Sometimes I’ll go to pick up a book I’ve put on hold and other times I like to go and just look around. There’s something about discovering a good book at the library and then checking it out.  I just got this for FREE.  Woah.  Still blows my mind and makes me super excited.

go for a nice long walk, just letting myself wander: Earlier this week I went for a walk around the block that turned into a 30 minute walk into a neighborhood I hadn’t walked through before.  I started walking and got this feeling of I just want to keep going.  So I did. Look at this amazing house I stumbled on…

walk around a bookstore: Bookstores have a totally different energy than libraries. I love wandering around bookstores too, looking at all the new books on the tables. I don’t usually buy things during my lunch hour, just like to go and peruse. It totally takes me away for a little while.

read a novel: I like to take a book outside and read or go sit in the kitchen or the lobby of the building for a change of scenery. But even taking some time to shut off my computer monitor and read at my desk is a nice change of pace.  Good quiet, relaxing time.

Talk to me:

What’s your favorite thing to do during lunch?

Looking for new things to do to light you up during lunch? Take a look back at your inspiration list for ideas.

a relationship secret ingredient?

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I had a great conversation with a friend about our relationships the other day. We found the when we feel happy with ourselves, when we’re at our best, our relationships with our significant others are better.  The more attracted I am to myself, the more I’m aligned/connected with my true authentic self, the more attracted I am to my husband.

I’m serious about this. This feels so good.  So so good. Our relationship is better, our connection is better, the sex is better–and more frequent!

I feel like we’ve uncovered a secret relationship gem.  One of the many magic bullets.

So, OK. Knowing this secret ingredient, how can we use it to our advantage?

Well, under what circumstances do you feel most like yourself? In what situations are you, you? Got it? OK. Now create those for yourself as regularly as possible.

I imagine this goes both ways. So, how can you encourage your significant other to be himself? How can you put yourself in situations where your husband feels confident and alive, where his true self, that amazing person you fell in love with can come out? Got it? OK, great.  Make that happen.

And report back, will ya?

what i do as a life coach

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In September 2011, I wrote this on my blog:

We were on the boardwalk and a little girl was sitting two benches down from us admiring a new hermit crab and holding onto a green balloon.  It’s pretty windy here today and the balloon got caught in the wind and started bouncing down the boardwalk.  Did the little girl cry?  Nope.  She said “let’s get it” and started running after it with a big smile on her face.  She and her uncle finally caught up to it and she walked back our way with her arms around the balloon and a huge smile on her face.  They walked past us on their way to do whatever it is they were going to do next.  Two or three minutes later, we see a green balloon bouncing by again. It brushes Mike’s leg as it bounces under the bench we’re sitting on and a pinkish red one follows.  And here comes the uncle chasing after it again, the little girl following quickly behind, still with a big smile on her face.  And i thought, this is a great metaphor for life.  If your green balloon starts to blow or bounce away, just run after it with a big smile on your face. You’ll get it.

This is what I do now. As a life coach, I help my clients chase after their balloons with a smiles on their faces.

thoughts from Juliet

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I was flipping through some old journal notes and came upon this quote  I jotted down from The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. It still resonated with me when I reread it so I thought I’d share it with you.

“I don’t want to be married just to be married. I can’t think of anything lonelier than spending the rest of my life with someone I can’t talk to, or worse, someone I can’t be silent with.” ~Juliet, The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society, page 8

Two questions:

1) Thoughts on the passage?

2) Have you read this book? I read it around Christmas time and really enjoyed it. It’s told through a series of letters and it’s interesting to see how the plot and characters develop through notes to and from different characters.

begin again

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After hearing Taylor Swift’s Begin Again on the radio multiple times, I finally really listened to it and came to appreciate it. I love this song so much for the message, the truth behind it.

We often let our past relationships and experiences shape our beliefs about how things are and will be in the future, about how we are and will be in the future. We let our significant other’s view of us shape our view of ourselves and what we believe to be true about ourselves–whether we are funny or not, pretty or not, that we do or do not look good in navy blue. The beliefs of the other person become our own.  And it’s understandable that this happens.

The surprise we have when we realize that something new is true.  That a different reality is possible.  That it doesn’t have to be that way. And that’s what this song is all about.  The beauty and hope of a new beginning. A new paradigm.